Engagement Photos: Today’s Great Tip For A Killer Session!

So he put a ring on it and now you’re venturing into the the world of wedding planning.  You’ve probably had at least a few moments of being overwhelmed and are now trying to remedy that by seeing what you can cross off of your gigantic to-do list now.

via Adrienne Gunde

Your engagement photo session is one of those things to get proactive about, especially if all the ideas you’ve pinned are specific to a season that will soon be wrapping up.  If you’ve already hand-picked a great photographer you may have no apprehension at all, but some brides feel a little pressure for the engagement shoot.  I mean, it is the photo session that will be all over your wedding website, maybe your save the dates, probably a few shots will be in your wedding and wedding videos, etc.  Quality photographers know how to capture the magic and make sure that the love you share translates in photos, but if you’re still a little nervous about trying to look your best while posing for these uber important photos, we know a trick that will help you be more natural and comfortable...

Action, action, action!

Plan a fun or sweet event for your and your love to do for your engagement session!  It can be big and extravagant or it can be something simple that you both love to do, but it will help you be natural!  Of course you will want some posed shots in there too, but those will probably come naturally once you gets comfortable!

 via Lauren Conrad

 via Sincerely Kinsey

From dancing in an open studio, a nice park picnic, or a carnival, there are so many things you could enjoy together that would bring your romance to life in your photos!  If those ideas don’t suit you, just make action shots happen wherever you are by walking, playing in the leaves, or taking time to be unashamedly in love wherever you’re having your session!  Letting your photographer see your natural interactions will help them make sure the sweetness of your love translates!

via Style Me Pretty

Let go, relax, and be in love... it will look great!

July Nautical Inspiration

In lieu of the festive week of Independence day, we wanted to feature this bit of inspiration.  The obvious choice for this week would be Americana inspiration, but we thought instead we’d feature Americana’s classy cousin.  This Nautical palette is a classy compromise for those who love the Americana theme but want a more elegant affair.

The Nautical theme has a beachy, oceanic vibe, so while it’s not as informal as a vintage backyard wedding, there are still ways to keep it comfortable and personal. You get to keep the navy, but instead of bold reds, pair it with more subdued blushes, peach, and yellows and then balanced out with some neutrals and even gold for a little glam!

Glam doesn’t mean that you can’t keep it comfortable.  There’s plenty of room for cute ways to show personality.  We love the ways these groomsmen kept it light with the rope boutonnieres and the ones below with boat shoes.

 Talia Events

Mike Larson Photographers, Inc.

This is such a simple theme to build around, and can be perfected in the details!

Natalie Frank

Green Tree Photography

Pop The Champagne Events

Alea Lovely

Alea Lovely

We’re obsessed with the navy, the soft colored flowers, and the little bit of glitzy gold!  

If you’re interested in a nautical wedding, check out our Nautical invitation, pictured here in Navy & Magnolia with Gold Foil.  Everything we do is customizable, so you could adapt it to your colors, but it’s a great pick for your elegant Nautical wedding!  If you’re not going with Nautical, we have a beautiful line of wedding invitations to choose from, or we could custom design one for your big day!

Too Many Hands In On The Plans: How To Deal With Momzillas!

Planning a wedding can be extremely stressful!  Budget is one of the biggest anxiety-inducing aspects (check out our post on ways to cut costs and avoid unnecessary financial stress in planning), but the other biggest point of stress is consolidating two family’s traditions, values, culture and personality into one ceremony and celebration!  If leaving Aunt Marge’s new husband’s extended family off the guest list to keep the number of guests below 150 doesn’t cause a family war, something else probably will!

Modern times have freed the bride’s family from the traditional burden of paying for the wedding, which has relieved some of the pressure on brides to let their mother make all the planning choices.  Back when a bride’s family was responsible for funding the whole shin-dig, it seemed less possible to be able to take a stand for the kind of wedding she was wanting; times have changed.

Really, no matter who is paying for the wedding, the bride and groom should be the ones making the choices; but a mother of the bride/groom may not always see it that way.  If this is your predicament, take a deep breath and remind yourself that it IS just misguided love; she wants your big day to be perfect!  “Perfect” just looks different to you than it does to her.

It’s far easier to plan your own wedding without the awkward power struggle.  It’s a natural feeling (whether or not’s a proper one) for family to feel that if they’re helping financially, that your say should weigh in on the planning process.  It’s not a fair perspective necessarily, but it’s natural; and when you accept someone’s financial gift, you accept the possibility of running into this.

So what do you do if she won’t relent?  You find opportunities to include her without compromising what’s important to you and your groom.  If there are choices in aspects of the wedding that you don’t feel as strongly about, let her help you in your decision... be it a food decisions or a floral.  If at all possible, avoid having to have the “It’s OUR wedding” talk, but if she’s still pushing on issues that you are determined to not budge it just may be necessary.  Make it clear that you know she means well and you want to include her, but that you and your groom have made your own choices.  We all have our irrational moments, but she’ll most likely snap out of it and remember that these decisions are important for you two.

You and your groom deserve a chance at creating the wedding day that you want without drawing family resentment; but it’s also important to appear grateful for the offered help.  Make sure you harness your inner bridezilla urge to freak out and remind yourself that it really is love, it’s just coming in the form of misguided “help”.  Lots of people are guilty of it (they want to help in the way they want to help, not in the way you need it).  Be patient and kind, but don’t be a pushover.  You can’t get this experience back, so you don’t want to regret the way you handled it, or didn’t handle it!

Signature Drinks: Another Way To Brand Your Wedding!

Don’t underestimate the option of having a signature drink (or a few) at your wedding!  This is a great way to brand your wedding in a memorable way!  Martha Stewart posted many ideas for cocktails that would taste wonderful and leave a signature stamp on your big day.  Also, The Knot has an incredible index of signature cocktails!  Most consist of simply blending traditional drinks with a new spin.  Many combine a fruity flavor with a mint, basil or herb.

It’s a beautiful thing, because these drinks can be selected by what goes with your color scheme if you so choose, as many of them are just as great to look at.  From floating fruit to curled lemon zest, mint or basil leaves, celery (in a Watermelon Bloody Mary).  These signature drinks will be an unforgettable staple in your wedding.

I suggest you find concoctions that you and your groom love (since the day is about capturing your personalities and sharing).  The beautiful thing is, this isn’t like the food, where you have to worry about everyone liking your choice; because there will be other options for guests who aren’t interested in your novelty drinks.

This is also a wonderful idea for those who have an open bar, but don’t want to splurge on every drink option; it’s increasingly common to offer guests limited options.  Having unlimited beer, wine, and your signature cocktail is a great way to not skimp out but also save some of that moolah you’re trying to spread around your wedding budget.

Don’t feel excluded from this, those of you having an alcohol-free wedding.  There are plenty of virgin drinks you can put together.  Consider all your fruit juice options with fruit or herbal garnish, or even iced coffee mixtures!  You still have plenty of options.

Rules of Engagement: Engagement Party Etiquette!

You said yes, and now a celebration is on the horizon!  There are a few important notes of etiquette for your engagement party.  Don’t get worried, they’re not too meticulous!

The first one is pretty simple:  Have your engagement party soon after the engagement, when the exciting news is still fresh!  To try to announce your engagement at the party is quite a feat now, since social media pretty much has everything in our lives captured and spreading quickly; if you managed to keep it a secret to announce at the party, make sure you have a good excuse/reason for gathering everyone together.

It used to be that it was considered rude to invite anyone to a pre-wedding event that will not be invited to the wedding; but now that more people are doing smaller, intimate weddings or flying to a beach to exchange vows, it’s not necessarily the rule anymore.  If tradition is something you’re pursuing, make your engagement party a smaller affair to be safe (if you don’t already have your guest list hammered out.  If you do, invite accordingly.).  Since you will not be hosting this event, make sure you discuss this with the host/hostess.

Another important note is that an engagement party is not a gift-giving affair.  Your preferences for gift or registry should not be mentioned on the invitation, and any gifts that you do receive should be opened in private.  Inevitably there will be some who want to give gifts, so it is appropriate to make sure and tell your hostess where you are registered so they can relay the information asked.  Bottom line is that it’s not a time when gifts are to be expected, so including your registry in any way besides word of mouth might send the opposite message.  If it’s a small event, most people wouldn’t bring more than flowers, wine, or another hostess-style gift.

At a traditional engagement party hosted by the bride's parents, the etiquette for toasts is: First, the bride's father proposes a toast to the bride and her fiance. Then, the fiance toasts his bride-to-be and her parents, and then his own parents. At informal events hosted by friends, anyone can make a toast at any time. Certainly, the engaged couple will want to toast the host.

The last suggested bit of protocol would be that the bride and groom get a gift to thank the host of the party.  This is the beginning of the monumental process and is a memory you will treasure, so that in combination with the work that they put in to organize the celebration is something to show your gratitude for.  It doesn’t call for anything extravagant; the best kind of gift would be one that you know is a gift of interest to them (theater tickets, tickets to see their favorite team or concert, etc.).

That’s not so bad, right?  Enjoy your celebration!  Since you won’t be throwing this party, if you do have expectations or preferences, be sure to let your host know (don’t be a control freak, but if it’s related to the guest list, size, or even if you want a more simple/outdoor kind of thing, let them know).  This way you can sit back and enjoy the party and planning without any worries.

Post Wedding Tasks: Thank You Note Etiquette

Many brides put so much work into planning every detail of their dream wedding that they wear themselves out look forward to their big day as a liberation from the chaos.  “I do" feels more like “I’m done”.  Well, lovely brides, that is not at all the case.  Etiquette calls for only a 2-3 week window before you send out a thank you for every gift!

Photo Credit:  Mountainside Bride

It’s easy to forget about any work to be done when enjoying the freedom of the wedded-bliss-coma you experience after your nuptials.  The honeymoon is a dramatic change of events after the obsessive, hair pulling stress of planning your wedding, so it’s common to get lethargic in enjoying your life together as Mr & Mrs; but penning your gratefulness is a very important task, as it means much more than you think to most people.


I need your full attention for a moment, as we tread over some important territory:  Resist the urge to email or do anything other than handwriting and mailing your thank you notes!  You will be tempted, after a luxurious honeymoon with the looming thought of soon being thrusted back into reality, to not spend your free time handwriting your notes.   You could just type them, which would look nicer than your handwriting (not to mention that you type 80 words per minute, which would cut the time investment down to a fraction of the handwritten);  BUT, your scribed note feels so much more personal to your gift giver than a typed one.


Make sure that you mention the gift they gave you (even if it’s monetary), and tell them how you used it or plan to use it.  If they bought you the measuring spoons on your registry, let them know that you intend to put them to work baking goodies for your groom.  If it’s a monetary gift, let them know what you’ve bought with it (be it an item in your registry that no one purchased, or if you’re pooling it together with others to do the much-needed renovations in your kitchen--they will be glad to know.

It may seem like a daunting task, so work out a plan.   Do 5-10 a day until they’re knocked out, or grab yourself a drink, put on your favorite movie, and power through all of them.  As much as you’re procrastinating, the anxiousness you feel will be completely settled after you’ve sent them all off!  

Making Cents of Your Wedding Dreams: Your Wedding Budget!

Photo from OneWed.com

Okay, he put a ring on it, and you now have the exciting task of assembling the wedding you’ve been dreaming about your whole life.  You’re tearing out magazine clippings (or saving them digitally via your wedding planning app), scrambling to find the perfect venue, the dress that you just know is the one, and line up the details.  BUT, there’s one very important thing that must be figured before you’re able to move forward… figuring out your budget.

The old tradition was that the cost of the wedding was the responsibility belonged to the father/family of the bride; but times are changing and now it is much more common for the cost to be divided between the families of the bride and groom, or even just the bride and groom themselves.  The topic of finances can be taboo in some families, so the best option is for you and your groom to meet with your parents and his parents separately and ask them how much they will be able to contribute.  It may not be your favorite conversation to have, but knowing what kind of budget you’re working with will enable you to get back to the fun aspects of planning!

The average wedding costs around 30 thousand dollars, so it’s very easy to rack up bills beyond what you can afford, or end up having to cut things out of the wedding.  The trick is, to prioritize the most important details in your wedding.  Pick the few items that you know you don’t want to compromise and are willing to splurge on, be it the photographer/videographer that you decided a long time ago would do your wedding, the amazing country club venue, or the caterer that you know is pricey but refuse to pass up.  It’s important to consider which costs you won’t budge on, so when it’s time to shave costs to meet your budget you don’t end up compromising on something you’ll always regret.

There are several things that greatly effect the cost of your wedding, but one of, if not THE biggest is the number of guests.  In most situations, you pay caterers per guest; not to mention that for a larger crowd you need a larger venue.  Being realistic about what your budget allows for goes a long way in ending up with a wedding you are pleased with.  Ask yourself whether you would rather have 300 guests and compromise on the quantity and quality of what you can provide for them, or narrow it down to 50-100 people and provide a the perfect caterer, open bar, etc.  It’s about recognizing what is more important to you and your groom, and not letting the illusion of the greener grass on the other side (which usually comes with unrealistic expectations) cause you to stray from the aspects of your big day that are important to you.

A few ways to cut costs when planning a wedding:

1.    1.  Pay Cash on your bigger wedding costs, if at all possible.  Many wedding vendors offer a   discount for those who pay cash upfront (average of 2%)

2.    2.  Book As Early As Possible!  You tend to get a better deal for booking far in advance than if you’re trying to fit into their schedule with late notice!

3.    3.  Tie the Knot in an off-season!  As we’ve discussed before, it can pay to have a wedding in the off-season.  If you avoid holidays and the spring and summer wedding season, you may get a good discount AND have a wedding date that isn’t surrounded on all sides by weddings of people you know! If you have your heart set on a spring wedding right in the middle of the buzzing season, consider a day other than Saturday for your nuptials.

4.   

4.   4.  Ask for help!  Whether it’s assembling those DIY invitations, or putting together out-of-town guest gift baskets you made yourself (instead of paying for ready-made ones), or tying bows onto wedding favors, there are plenty of people who would love to be included, and if you save money and time, it’s a definite win-win!

5.    5.  Shop Around!  Although many times you find something and just know that it’s what you want, it’s important to still look around.  Like we talked about, you gotta save the splurges for the things that are really important; and if you haven’t price shopped, you may not know you’re spending above average.  Research vendors and costs, because finding a discount in one department opens up more funds for other department.

We get it, it’s not the fun part!  Just don’t lose sight of what you’re working toward.  Your wedding is one of the only times, possible the only time, in your life that the most important people from both of your worlds will be in one place.  Not to mention that it’s for the day that you and your best friend make it official that you are doing the rest of your lives TOGETHER.  First comes budget talks, but then comes marriage!  

To Trim or Not To Trim: Solving Your Guest List Dilemmas!

One of the more daunting tasks in planning your big day is collaborating with your husband-to-be and compiling a list of candidates to make the cut of wedding guests; and then, together, narrowing the list.  This can be touchy, because you know your mother will be mortified if your third cousin twice removed and her new husband (and his kids) aren’t invited; and your fiancé has made up his mind that his college football team should all be on the wedding guest roster.

Photo from Vivid Blue Photography

From invitations to wedding and reception venues and catering, the size of the guest list largely affects the cost of your wedding.  Whether it is that you know that a smaller wedding is what your budget allows, or you desire a more intimate environment with 50 guests, it’s hard to deal with the idea of hurting the feelings of so many people you love by leaving them out of your wedding day.  

If you’re having a big wedding, what is your reason for keeping so many guests?  If you’re going to have to sell your plasma to pay your catering bill, it better be because you’ve dreamt of the crowd, not because you would feel guilty leaving anyone out.

Another option, if you can’t decide, is to have your big wedding, and invite a much smaller number of people to your reception.  There may still be some hurt feelings, but everyone will get to see you and your groom exchange vows; and you get the intimate reception with a significantly smaller catering bill and a group small enough you won’t be swallowed by it.  This infographic from the Knot presents a great thought process:

If you do have a small wedding, maybe you could send out a wedding announcement to those who would have been invited if it were larger... one that looks similar to the invitation and just lets those you love know that they weren’t forgotten!


Your big day is just that, YOUR big day.  You share it with the people you want to, and will treasure the memories forever.  Consider who exactly it is you want to share the memories with, on that day, and make your decision accordingly!

  

Photo Balance: Finding The Photographer That Suits You!

As most people planning a wedding know, choosing a photographer is not as simple as it sounds.  Finding a photographer that captures the biggest day of your life is HUGE.  It’s a matter of not only finding a photographer who does it will, but finding one who does so in a style that matches you.  A style that when you look at, down the road, you will be able to relive the magic of your beautiful day.

Photography and videography are the ways that you immortalize that day.  Your wedding dress, whether you trash it for great photos, store it as a keepsake, or find a pinteresty way to display it, is really only for he day.  Your make-up, hair, and all those mason jars you stuffed with nostalgia or personalized knick-knacks will only be for the day (afterward that you’ll be finding other random uses for them or giving them away).  Your centerpieces, decor, and every creative touch will end up stored in boxes somewhere or in the trash and the ONLY way that you keep the details of your wedding alive are in photos and video.

This post is about photography, so I won’t go into videography here (although it’s also an important part of your day).  The photographs will fill the album that you show to people for years to come, they will hang in your home together, they’re what your future children and even grandchildren.  They are how YOU will relive the day that you promised your whole life to your best friend.  It’s important.

So if you carelessly choose a photographer that shows up and puts you in awkward and unnatural poses, or captures the wrong moments and not the right moments, or captures the right moment with the wrong kind of shot... you will regret it.  There’s a big difference between having knowledge of photography, and having an eye for photography.  Photography knowledge alone can leave your wedding day photos looking like a Walmart Photo Studio shot your wedding.  Overly posed and unnatural.  But if you choose a photographer that has an eye for what looks good, they will find shots that you  (even you who don’t find yourselves to be photogenic and feel awkward) will feel great about... shots that take a simple moment and make an extraordinary picture.

Look through their body of work and notice the angles, the originality and quality.  Make sure their artistic level suits you and the style of your wedding.  It’s important.  When all the dust settles after the wedding, and in the years to come, this will be the way that you revisit the magic of the day.

This photo is one that I love and chose to use because of the originality.  There are plenty of photos that show their faces, the details of the dress, etc.; but the photographer took a moment that could have made a much more basic photo and chose an angle that made it a work of art.  I adore this one.

Photo by Tamara Thomas Photography
You may contact her on facebook by email at TamaraLynnThomas@gmail.com

Blake’s Elaborate Plans!

The beautiful Blake Lively had her perfect SURPRISE wedding the end of last month when she married our beloved Ryan Reynolds.  A little heartbreaking for those of us who have fallen in love with him, but he deserves happiness!  And they make for a ridiculously good-looking couple.  We could all assume that theirs would be a gorgeous wedding, if for no other reason than that both the bride and groom look like a Greek God and Goddess; but what surpassed our expectation is the involvement level Blake had in the planning process.

Not only did she help design her Marchesa gown to go with her 12-carat pink diamond wedding ring, but she brought 250 photos to her wedding planner, Tara Guerard, of elements she wanted included in the wedding.  She knew what she wanted for her big day, from beginning to end.  She wanted to make sure it was warm and friendly for her guests!  Wedding planner Tara Guerard told People.com: “It was in a barn, and it was really fun to take this rustic barn element and dress it up inside.  It was really lovely, lots of candles, just like she has at home... She wanted it to feel just like she was at home.”

Blake’s role in the planning process was admirable.  I know that many of us could only dream of planning every detail of our wedding on a gazillion dollar budget, not having to worry about money; but many celebs opt to choose a few basic details and let the rest go to a professional event designer/planner (which we can’t blame them for, knowing how stressful the process can get)!

Pictures from the event are set to appear in the December issue of Martha Stewart Weddings magazine.  I don’t know about you, but I CAN’T WAIT to see and get more details!

The Bridesmaid Role: Responsibilities That Come With The Title

One of the disservices that Hollywood’s love of weddings has done us is the glamorous depiction of being a bridesmaid or maid of honor; which kinda gives real bridesmaids the impression that it can also be about them.  Bridesmaids, please note that the only time the wedding or your role in the wedding is about you is when it appropriately circles back to the bride (i.e. your toast about your friendship and how much it’s meant to you, and how you wish them happiness... see how it circled back?).  The ultimate goal is selflessness.

First thing to remember:  A bride choosing you to be a part of the biggest day of her life is showing that she trusts you and values your role in her life.  The bride asking you is an honor, not a favor she’s asking of you.  It’s your honor, and your responsibility; so only accept the invitation if you’ve considered that and are willing to rise to the calling!  Once you’ve accepted the title, you’ve accepted all of the responsibility that it entails.  Don’t know what those responsibilities are?  Lucky you!  We’ve decided to let you in on the (often unspoken) rules of the role you’ve found yourself in.

Responsibilities of Bridesmaid:

1.  Support the bride’s vision for her wedding!  Don’t discourage her from going the direction she wants, even if that means you wear a dress you don’t love, or even like. Some brides let you pick out your own dress or have say in the dress.  If that’s your bride, be grateful; don’t get power-crazy and try to steamroll over the style and theme of the wedding. If there are rules about hair, makeup, etc. for the big day, stick to them.  Pushing limits and not doing what the bride asks of you only makes you look like you’re trying to make her big day about you.  Don’t try to incorporate your own style into it (unless she tells you to), this wedding is an expression of she and her groom... not of you.  If she asks your opinion about something, be honest (but not ever brutal).  If she's asking your opinion that usually means she’s considering it, but not 100% sure.  Never express dislike for something that she didn’t ask your opinion about.

2.  One of the most obvious responsibilities of a bridesmaid is to buy your dress for the wedding (and shoes)!  If this may be too much of a financial burden for you, you maybe should consider not accepting the title of bridesmaid, or speak to the bride about it. There’s no denying that situations arise (like the Kristin Wiig in “Bridesmaids”, I too, once lost my job after committing to be in a wedding), but the bride is already budgeting for an entire wedding, and doesn’t need to feel like she needs to pay for your dress, too.  Ask a family member or friend to spot you the cash, or trade a service (like babysitting) to pay off the debt.  A lot of major bridal shops offer financing, so paying for it over time could be an option too.

3.  Planning the Bridal Shower/Bachelorette Party!  This can be an expensive project if one bridesmaid carries the financial side of things, so it’s best to divide it between bridesmaids.  That’s not all of the responsibility though, there are many more.  From the guest list, to the invitations, decorating, food, games, and themes, there’s a lot of time involved in planning, too. Maybe if you’re struggling with the financial responsibility, explain that to the bridesmaids and offer to take on more of the time-consuming responsibilities.  A bridal shower should be a reflection of the bride’s style and personality, so make that happen in whatever way is appropriate for her (within means).

4.  Keep It Drama Free (to the best of your abilities).  So maybe you don’t like her sister and can’t even imagine having to plan a shower with her.  It doesn’t matter.  Your love for the bride should be more important than any negative feelings you have toward anyone else.  It’s a big deal for a bride, when people from all different aspects of her life come together, and it’s a nightmare if it leads to drama that makes her important time awkward.  Maybe she understands your personality and laughed at your “doesn’t play well with others” attitude in college, but please believe she doesn’t want it to disrupt the unity of this precious time with people she loves.  If there is any conflict, diffuse it as quickly as possible by being a part of the solution and not the problem.

5.  Catch All!  Being a “catch-all” means you accept any last minute responsibility you are able to, be it last minute decorating the reception hall, wrapping the favors in tulle circles or distracting the crazy aunt that stresses out the bride.  The sole responsibility of the wedding is not on you, but being a close friend/family member of the bride, you probably know best which things she really needs.  As long as you’re focused on it being her big day, it should all come very naturally to you.

Above and beyond that:  Just support the bride.  If you’re married, you understand how stressful the wedding planning process can be.  If you aren’t, try to sympathize anyway. Trying to budget and orchestrate the biggest day of your life, and do it to the standard you’ve set for yourself is a huge feat.  This is a time where plenty of people seemingly come out of nowhere (family members, in-laws, opinionated friends) and try to impose their ideas and opinions on you and often pick at the ideas and opinions you have for yourself.  It’s easy for most personalities to get so caught up in trying to make everyone happy that they forget what it’s really about and feel the stress, even in their relationship with their fiance!  The best thing you can do is be supportive of her and be someone that is a source of peace and not stress, whether that is getting her to laugh in a stressful moment or helping her finish a wedding project so she can go have a much-needed night out with her future husband.  SUPPORT her by being by her side.

Obviously, if you are a bridesmaid that lives far away and is flying in a few days before the wedding, not all of these responsibilities apply to you.  But for the rest, these are all definitely things to consider BEFORE accepting the title.  Most brides don’t want to be a bridezilla, and want to be viewed as a gracious bride, so it’s uncomfortable giving a list of demands.  We did it for them.  Proper Bridesmaid Etiquette, right here in plain text.

It’s important to consider it all, because the “office” of bridesmaid is not one that should be held half-heartedly.  Trust me when I say, a bride never forgets who was there for her through this important time; but it’s also a tough thing to move past when someone you love isn’t supportive or considerate through it.  This is the one day of her life that everything is allowed to be about her, so go into it knowing that.  That this is a time that should make your relationship stronger, but it will have the opposite effect if you don’t make an effort to contribute to this important season of her life.

Wedding Itinerary: A Guide For The Organized Bride!

Most brides can recite the run-down of W-Day to the minute, when to be where.  Most brides relay that information to the bridal party, and most bridal party members get caught up and don’t remember the schedule (most of them haven’t been the ones planning this day for months).  

Putting together a wedding day itinerary is a great idea to organize everyone else without having to repeat yourself over and over.  Getting a little creative with it isn’t a bad idea either!  Get together with your MOH and plan the day.  Be as basic or detailed as you feel you need to be (even make them gender-specific for the bridesmaids and groomsmen if you want).  Print the itineraries and delegate that responsibility out of your hands.  You don’t have to be a bridezilla to get things done, you just have to be willing to pass on the responsibility!

The Anti-Guest List: Be On The Same Page

Upon first mention, it sounds harsh to talk about who you DON’T want at your wedding.  When it comes to choosing the guest list, it’s much easier to just count people as casualties of the trimming process than to admit that there are some that actually are blacklisted.  However, if there are people that you really aren’t okay with putting on the guest list, you need to be clear about that with your groom and any family members who may want to include them.

Of course, it can be an uncomfortable topic, but it’s crucial to your sanity to get it out of the way early, so nothing unexpected pops up.  Your wedding should be a day where you are surrounded by the people who love and support you; and you shouldn’t have to worry about anyone who has other thoughts or motives.  Have open dialogue with your groom about who you won’t be comfortable with at your wedding.

Common roles that populate this list:

1.  Exes.  Unless you and your spouse are both comfortable with exes and their current role in your lives, this can be very uncomfortable.  How often does anyone sit at their ex’s wedding and think about how beautiful the couple is, or how they’re meant to be?  Discuss this honestly, because nobody deserves that uncomfortable situation at their wedding.

2.  Friends/Family Who Don’t Agree With The Wedding.  Whether it’s your friend who has talked bad about your groom since the day she met him, or a friend of his; you don’t need to invite people to your wedding who clearly aren’t in favor of it.

3.  Friends/Family Who Are Unstable Or Disruptive.  This is a tough one to put as a general group, because not everyone has someone like this in their family, or in their life. If you have a family member or friend who is an alcoholic or has drug issues or anything that causes them to make scenes or disrupt gatherings, you are entitled to leaving them off of your guest list.  It’s touchy, but it’s a choice you may have to make sometimes to keep the peace and protect your day.

*When it comes to family, consider carefully.  As much as situations come where you don’t feel like you would even want them there, remember that families go through seasons, and you’ll always remember whether or not they were there.  Give them a chance to support you, and if they make it clear that they aren’t supportive, then you are validated in not inviting them; just give it serious consideration.

When it comes to your soon-to-be-in-laws, let that be your spouse’s decision.  Even if his sister has hated you since day one and that’s uncomfortable, let it be his decision.  To show respect to his family (especially when you feel that they don’t deserve it) is to show respect to him.  Also, wouldn’t you rather be the sister-in-law that was gracious and forgiving than the wife who separated the family?  Even if you would be validated in taking that step, resist, because you don’t want that kind of resentment.

As for anyone else (besides family), I say it’s YOUR day, and don’t invite anyone based on obligation or fear of hurting feelings.  Weddings are expensive, they are important, and (for some) once-in-a-lifetime, so don’t let anyone else’s feelings override those of yours and your groom’s.

Peacock Wedding Inspiration Board!

Just a little inspiration for the ever-popular Peacock wedding theme.  It can be done in any variation of blues, greens, purples or even browns.  We used a J-Crew bridesmaid dress, bouquets by Art Fire, and an amazing cake that we couldn’t find the artist of; and of course we featured some of our peacock designs (the invitation, ceremony program, table card, and place card).  There’s much more than we have pictured (a response card, menu card, favor box, and note card), so go check it out!

There are so many ways to incorporate this theme, with one of nature’s most decorated designs!  Are you thinking of going with a peacock wedding theme?  What are your ideas?

A Little More Evolving, A LOT More To Offer!

As we’ve shared recently about the importance of evolving, here’s one of our newest developments.  Ta dahhhhh!!!  New note cards!  We’ve had custom note cards/thank you notes for your post-wedding stationery for quite some time; BUT they were never like the ones we’ve just come out with.

I don’t have a picture of the former ones at the current moment, so I’ll just tell you about them.  They were lovely, but unlike the rest of our products, the artwork was 100% printed.  We are best known for the unique laser cut, layered nature of our designs, and our note cards were never a reflection of that... until now.

We are pleased to present a different form of a note card, one that carries your wedding design and them beyond the big day, and carries our best qualities into your notes!  Enjoy!

This is our “Touch of Italy” invitation (so you can see the initial design) and note card!

Want to see more?  Visit the IntriCutz website.

Great Way To Save: Using Your Resources!

Networking can have a certain connotation to it that makes it sound like you’re using people; but in most cases, people you love are quick to want to contribute to your big day... especially if it somehow involves their specialty.

From knowing a great graphic designer who could design your photo save-the-date postcards, or an amazing baker who would do your cake as a wedding gift, to crafty hands that you would trust to do your handmade floral arrangements; remember that there are always options.  Resources that are untapped.  People that are waiting to get involved.

Wedding costs add up fast, so exhaust every possible avenue for help or discounts.  It’s not like you’ll be needing this same favor this time next year.  Be mindful of the resources and talents of the people you’re surrounded by!

First Pick: Solving Your Bestie Drama!

For some women, your Maid of Honor is an obvious pick.  You’ve never considered anyone but your sister to be next to you on your big day.  For others, you’ve had the same best friend since pre-school and there’s just no question.

For some of us, our paths are not so clear.  Between your high school best friend, your college best friend, and your current roommate that has been along for the ride of your whole relationship with your soon-to-be-husband... there is going to be a trail of heartbreak no matter who you pick.

That was very similar to my situation.  There were plenty of people in my wedding who mattered to me, from friends I grew up with in church, to my best friend from high school, to my more recent roommate and best friend.  My first instinct was to go with my roommate/current bestie, then she told me she was pregnant.  My high school best friend also ended up being pregnant.  If I had chosen one of those two, everyone would have understood, knowing how close I was to them.  So with them out of the Wedding Party pool, hurt feelings after picking my MOH was a sure thing, since many of them had a deep history with me and maybe felt like they were next in line.  Crowning my Maid of Honor wasn’t a natural process for me.

So what if, like me, your pick for Maid of honor falls through?  Is it proper etiquette to ask someone else if your first string cancels?  There’s no clear rule about this.  I did.  It was early in the game though, so it wasn’t like we’d been through all the pre-wedding events with a different Maid of Honor.  I feel like, if done right, it isn’t hurtful.  I think the key is probably to have open dialogue about it so it’s not a weird, elephant in the room situation.  One thing I did, is I still included my pregnant friend who couldn’t play the part in as much as possible, including choosing her to do the toast (which worked out nice since my Maid of Honor isn’t the type to feel comfortable speaking in front of a big crowd), and she helped me get ready.  Since it was an open subject, she was still able to play a big role in the behind-the-scenes too.  Everybody wins!

To the left is my (pregnant) friend and former roommate, Kristen, doing my makeup and helping me get ready for the day.






This is Genna.  She was my Maid of Honor.  Another great friend.  Someone I had lived with, that always kept me laughing.









Here are all my bridesmaids!








This is Kristen again, making a toast at the reception.  Probably the most heartfelt and meaningful toast ever given.  I was so glad that she was still involved.




It’s important to pick who you want to play that role.  Your Maid/Matron of Honor plays a big part in it all-being there for the planning, organizing your bridal showers and bachelorette party, and being by your side for whatever you need on your wedding day.  Don’t pick it based on who you feel people expect you to.  Pick someone who loves you and understands your personality, and recognizes any moment you need her.

If choosing is causing panic attack, there may be a solution:  Don’t choose!  A good friend of mine and her groom decided to not choose “Best”s, and keep a level playing field.  Between her sister-in-law, her roommate of 3 years +, a friend she’s grown up with, a long distance friend, and a friend she’s made in the past year or two, there’s obviously different levels of involvement; and she knows that.  But this way, she doesn’t have to choose one “best” if she has several, and no one spends her wedding feeling like someone was chosen for a role they felt better fitted for.  As the friend who grew up with her, I really see where this decision kept her pretty stress-free in the bridesmaid rivalry department!